new year

Having a family meal out tonight. then a quiet night in for the fireworks on tv. Looking forward to 2012 I hope its filled with lots of memories. Im feeling its going to be a bigger better year.

relieved

I feel sooooo relieved right now and sooo stress free. I feel like a great big weight has been lifted off my shoulders I just wanna bungee jump or something. Im so giddy and my heart keeps on laughing. I feel like a child that just got that toy that they have wanted for ages. Relief! The best present ever! Yes iv only just gone and finished one thing- it was bang on 11000 words and 86 pages- my dissertation :)

New years eve soon.

Some people swear there's no beauty left in the world, no magic,then how do you explain the entire world coming together on one night to celebrate the hope of a new year? And, indeed, New Year's Eve is all about hope—mostly of the relational kind. It is there to remind us before we go ahead and celebrate the New Year, to stop and reflect on the year that has gone by. To remember both our triumphs and our missteps - our promises made, and broken. The times we opened ourselves up to great adventures - or closed ourselves down, for fear of getting hurt. Because that's what New Year's is all about: getting another chance. A chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more. And to stop worrying about 'what if' and start embracing what would be. It’s OK to listen to your heart. I know it’s risky. But every now and then you have to take that leap. There are so many things you can’t control: earthquakes, war, famine. It’s important to remember the things we can control, things like love and forgiveness. … Love in every one of its forms. Loves gives us hope. Hope for the New Year.

time on this planet is way too limited

christmas day

consisted of lamb leg, endless disney animation films and playing with the kids. sounds good to me.

ticking

christmas eve

only means one thing Christmas socks.

light

yaaaay yaaay yaaay Im so happy I feel like I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I only have 1000 words left of my dissertation and redrafting to do then I am done! I cannot wait to take a break. I feel like Iv worked my self silly this semester. A few more days of working hard then I can relax. Just want the new year to be here already. I need a fresh start.

Trust

I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately. I know you probably think Im boring and philosophical but its in my nature. I cant help it. I feel like this year more than any year has been a learning experience for me. Iv learnt to not let people into my life so easily. The problem with me is I give myself too easily, its because I wanna believe people are good. I wanna believe the best in them and believe that they mean whats best in the relationship. But its time to grow up and realise that sometimes it just doesnt go that way and people dont always think through their actions. Its time to put my guard up and be careful who I share my life with. And this is it. My new years resolution. Learn from experiences, move on and be careful who I trust.

the best way is to just build a bridge and get over it

Target

Dissertation complete by Friday. End of.

let it go

Letting go is one of those things that one needs to learn to do. It can often be difficult if something or someone means a lot to you. The heaviness on the heart is not healthy.

 

manchester markets

Just a couple of pictures from the christmas markets in manchester today. Had a lovely day with my friends wondering the markets and eating yum food!

my handmade christmas presents

battle

met the monkeys!

Met my cheeky little monkeys today and they are just theeee most adorable edible little pumpkins I have ever seen! I have 40 children to oversee and 18 cannot speak english very well and 5 are on special needs statements. So it seems I have my work cut out! But I am looking forward to rising to the challenge and hope to shine. Cannot wait to read them the runaway chappatti!

wise words

Your never going to know the outcome of things that happen in life. This is one of those situations that you put yourself through, because its worth it. For the lesson it may give or the actual outcome of it.

off to school

So its off to school tomorrow I go to meet my little monkeys! I am so excited to teach the tiny little inquisitive minds. I have two visit days so hopefully I can start to get to know all their names and interests. Its exciting that this is it. My last and final teaching practice before I am fully qualified- and I aim to make it the best yet. I dont want to be any ordinary teacher I want to be an outstanding teacher that all children look up to and I hope this is what I achieve. I better start rambling on and get an early night seen as I have to wake up early at 6.30 tomorow. But just thought Id make note of this exciting time for me :D

just keep swimming

A night in with beyonce..love this lady..she empowers us women! Just sat watching her live concert. A friday night pick me up!

if I were a boy

To the left to the left....

Who run the world? Girls!!!

what goes around comes back around

Words

I hate love, its a painful torture. Beautiful or not, it hurts. Day after day sticking by someone who only cares when they want too. Feeling so low because its the little things hurt you so much. The little things that you don't expect can hurt you more than you think. How do you know when someone truly loves you? Truth is, you don't. You have to hope that they feel the same, because you can never truly know how someone is feeling. Never wear your heart on your sleeve it only ends up hurting you more. No more. My problem is I want to believe the best in everyone, all those around me. When you love someone you want to believe their good, that their a good person and they can do no wrong. But sometimes you have to learn that life doesn't pan out that way and not everyone truly means well and is honest. Sometimes its just words. Words that mean something to you, but when they leave you realise they were only words.

Im good at most except the last part.

festive

busy week so far..I mean are we really on Thursday tomorrow? Its such a concern of mine how fast time goes..there really not enough hours in a day. Today I spent my final day at school tieing up some loose ends for my research and the other half of the day making my Christmas pressies. I got these beautiful beads from my trip to Qatar in summer and still haven't done anything with them. So I promised myself that I shall make my friends some lovely bracelets. I started on them tonight and if I must say so myself I think they look beaut. Except there's one thing now..I want to wear them and keep them! Why does that always happen? I always either make my friends something or buy them something that I would want to keep. I suppose that is when you really know its a nice present. I will put some pictures up when they are all done and the vintage christmas cards of course. So tomorrow Im at uni in the morning for a shoddy two hours then Its my friends birthday so were going out for a meal in the evening. So will probably spend the day lounging around somewhere cosy- think I may take a trip to Starbucks and treat myself to a hazelnut hot chocolate its a dreaaaam! Oh and Im handing in my poster- finally its out of my life and my living room! So yes Im beginning to feel the festive spirit even though I dont really celebrate christmas I just love the lights and the atmosphere. Which can only mean one thing..New Year! Not decided what Im doing with my new years eve..because I am working new years day..lucky me. Will have to make up for it a week late I think and a trip to manchester to hit the sales will certainly be due with my bestest. Take a look at these pics of we heart it that get me in the mood for festivities...oh and Iv also decided I want an eid tree when I get my own place one day. Adds to the excitement of the occasion I think.

Wouldn't mind being in london around christmas time- my brothers so lucky he gets to go!

Marry the night

Treating myself to a snuggy duvet morning today after all the hard work I put in on the weekend. Listening to this new band called Lawson. Im addicted to their acoustic cover of Lady Gaga 'Marry the Night'. Here it is.

sense of achievement!

Aiiiii I have finally finished the god damn poster! Im so glad its out of my life. Now I can focus on more important things like finishing this dissertation and getting to know my little monkeys who I will be teaching from January onwards. Was just thinking of all the arty things I will have to think about- i.e. chinese new year, valentines day, mothers day and easter..so there will be lots of lovely activities to plan for. I cant wait for 2011 a new year and a fresh start I feel as though things are really starting to look up. I know your thinking everyone says that and its just a date. but no- really I just cant wait to do what I love doing best- teaching the little ones. I feel as if all the frustration I'm feeling right now is being energetically driven out of me and focused into my hopeful career. All I need to do is start working out a little and starting my body combat again to get in shape but all I wanna do right now is hibernate and eat nice food. Im just a curvy girl that needs deliciousness in her life. So yes thats it my life as it stands. Tomorrow I have a careers fair which should be interesting as I have loads of questions ready- Im one of those annoying people that has to ask lots of questions and the answers they give are never enough. Now you cant knock me for enthusiasm! So hopefully Il find more light tomorrow as in where else I can think of applying for jobs. Exciting exciting exciting..I cant think of any other words its late!

Cosy

All warm and cosy and snuggled up in bed in my tartan jim jams..got work very soon. Really cannot be bothered today working by that windy till. Oh well...think of the money. I have a family dinner tonight at my aunties then Il come home and finish this damn poster- its been going on for too long now. I will finish it even if I have to stay up all night. Yes so thats what my day will consist of really.. nothing exciting just the sunday usual.

Me time

Phew! What a week..I havent stopped! So I decided to take some ME time today and just sit relax watch crappy TV and do nothing. Maybe Il blog a little and scroll through endless pages on we heart it. Oh and not to mention the Krispy Kreme I have to indulge in tonight!

Already?

Shattered

Shattered..this work is sucking my life and endless possibilities from me. Roll on January the 6th 2012.

possibilities

Soo having an interview offer for job in a school abroad...it happened....yes its always been my lifelong dream! BUT here comes the reality check! Its nice to know that people think Im employable and that I have had such a good response from my job applications because hopefully some day in the future I will be able to accept. But for know I think I owe it to myself to get my NQT year complete and stick it out a couple years here to give Britain my service. After all I was educated here. So that's the plan. Although I have an interview for a local teaching pool in march. So things are looking optimistic and hopefully Il get a few more interviews rolling in! EEeeek the excitement of the endless possibilities. Hopefully Il be preparing for christmas nativities with the little mokeys this time next year!

If I could choose..it would be to see this lady.

Cannot believe its Saturday again one week definitely flies round wayyyy to quick. Its scary that my lovely project has to be in in 5/6 weeks... okay enough of the talking and more of the doing i think. Im just so worried I have so many things whizzing around in my tiny little brain at the moment, including applying for jobs, going to uni, doing this project and preparing to teach my class in January. The thought of all this is making me sick. So I have already promised myself a productive day today, after I finish tutoring at three I shall redraft my lit review and methodology chapter. And if Im feeling brave Il start analysing my results. So there are my personal targets for today..i sound silly saying them on here but I feel as though it helps because its written down and Il feel guilty if I dont do it. Its all about mind trickery here! And not to mention Il be finishing my evening off with a little bit of my guilty pleasure yes its the x factor! Im thinking that I should get my christmas presents made too and cards. Sooo yes..thats my busy dysfunctional life! Hope you have a good day whatever you decide to do..im sure its more exciting than mine. But oh well- its all to pay off eventually. Oh and Iv been saving ultrahard for my macbook pro! Super exciting!

hair

Okay so iv been looking into this for a while now..since my hairs grown really really long and im finding it slightly un manageable I figured it would be a good idea to get some layers..or get it shaped. But then I do like my classic one length cut. Iv seen a few cuts that I like, I might grow it so its super long then the scissor happy hairdressers wont cut it all off when I go to have it done. Here is the kind of cut Im thinking...

I think the style that Im looking for is the 'graduated layered' look, I want a feminine soft layered cut if you know what I mean! We all know how difficult it is to give a hair dresser a vision you have and then they go and do their own thing. Which is why I rarely go for anything apart from a trim. But im fed up..its time to take a little risk. If you have any good hairdresser suggestions..let me know. Im willing to pay a little extra to get it right- we all know how precious a girls hair can be!

up up up!

Had an up day today..so first of all I managed to get an interview for this teaching pool I applied for and second of all I got my placement for school and its a church school which I love! I feel like things are slowly looking up for me..just gotta keep working hard get this silly poster assessment outta my life and this horrid 10,000 word dissertation. I'm so excited about what the future may hold. Cannot wait- its so strange to think that this time next year I could have my own class! Hopefully 6 years of perseverance will finally all be worth it.

jar of hearts

nobody understands

In the words of Adele

Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.

Magic

We all start out knowing magic. We are born with whirlwinds, forest fires, and comets inside us. We are born able to sing to birds and read the clouds and see our destiny in grains of sand. But then we get the magic educated right out of our souls. We get it churched out, spanked out, washed out, and combed out. We get put on the straight and narrow and told to be responsible. Told to act our age. Told to grow up, for God’s sake. And you know why we were told that? Because the people doing the telling were afraid of our wildness and youth, and because the magic we knew made them ashamed and sad of what they’d allowed to wither in themselves.

After you go so far away from it, though, you can’t really get it back. You can have seconds of it. Just seconds of knowing and remembering. When people get weepy at movies, it’s because in that dark theater the golden pool of magic is touched, just briefly. Then they come out into the hard sun of logic and reason again and it dries up, and they’re left feeling a little heartsad and not knowing why. When a song stirs a memory, when motes of dust turning in a shaft of light takes your attention from the world, when you listen to a train passing on a track at night in the distance and wonder where it might be going, you step beyond who you are and where you are. For the briefest of instants, you have stepped into the magic realm.

Robert McCammon’s Boy’s Life

Tribal

let go and be happy

megahyper even though im ill...no idea how or where I get these sudden bursts of energy that make me want to jump about and dance to rihanna all day in my bedroom.

plans plans plans

Busy day ahead today with the kiddies teaching lovely maths! I seem to have woken up with sharp daggers in my throat and its really sore, will just have to try teach without talking to much. But we are talking about the queen of talking here- so yes we'll see how that goes! After they've gone I intend to do some more application forms for some local teaching pools. I really cannot wait to get a job next September! Eeeek the possibility that I will have my very own class sends shivers down my spine. I will probably end my evening with some x-factor- yes I know your thinking- NOT X FACTOR I know its full of theatrics and isn't really about the talent, but I gta give it to you I just LOVE the drama. I watch it and yes complain because they always boot the good ones off- but it can be very entertaining. You should try it if you havent already! Seriously its a guilty pleasure of mine!

Bitten fig

Wanted to show you my jewellery today. At the moment Im having lots of fun jazzing up my outfits to make them boho. I am also obsessed with this burgundy maroony colour and to tie it altogether I bought revlon's new felt tip lip pen in bitten fig. I hope your having fun with fall trends just as much  as I am!

galaxy chocolate voice...LOVE this girl!

crossroads

There are moments in our lives where we find ourselves at crossroads. Where we have to make choices that will define us for the rest of our days. These choices are the ones that can make things better or not. But the choices we make can only be the best to us for that moment.

Some of us escape the pain of regret by making looking forward to our future. Some of us have little time for regret because we're busy with our plans..busy defining ourselves- building us. Sometimes we have to fight to come to terms with the past, and sometimes we bury our regret by promising to change our own ways. Build it, change it and look forward. Don't look back. 

Blouse of the day

this hair is a little quirky

i have respect for this lady

sweet popcorn, hulahooping, warm woolies, ed sheeran, cosy pj's, 10,000 word dissertation, school, work, work work, making christmas gifts, job applications, maths tutoring on saturdays, charity work...woah my lifes a little busy right now.

lovely meal

Had a lovely evening with a few peeps from my workplace. Went for the best indian ever at one of my favourite places- east is east (I know very original name!) But despite the name the food was Deeeeelicious. I feel as though Iv eaten for days now, oh well. I am definitely hoping to start my hula hooping toning sessions again. Its not about wanting to be thin its just about feeling good about my curves and toning up that I want. Me and my friend were just saying today that we should count ourselves lucky that we have hourglass figures as so many girls would die for it (even though we think they are probably crazy) oh well- its just one of those things- you can never be satisfied with what you have. Its learning to love yourself as stupid as that sounds! Anyway I better get some sleep seen as I have a busy week ahead with some lovely insightful 5 year old beings.

vintage vibes

This is a cuff of the day (or jumper of the day really)  from a while back I had forgotten to upload. The jumper is from one of my fav vintage places- retro rehab- oldham st. manchester. Its very oversized but with some nice skinnies it looks lovely/ Hope you like :)

Must be the saddest thing to be sat in my red tartan pj's, on my laptop tumbling and eating love hearts to make myself feel better. Its one of those days where i just feel like scruffing my hair up in a bun, wearing my cupcake socks and being miserable. Were allowed those days. On the up-side Im having microwave popcorn tonight- and its sweet!

eleventh of the eleventh two thousand and eleven

Im just fascinated- that is all!

blurry vision?

Just finished syncing my playlist to my phone for the long journey tomorrow as I have to get up very early tomorrow, getting the train into uni for a morning meeting with a career advisor. Plus my playlist is extremely old and is lacking new vibes. I need new in my life right now to keep me motivated! I want to polish up my CV and personal statement so I can conquer the world with my passion for teaching. Okay well maybe not the world but the UK for now.

Wouldn't mind one of these right now!

Holding on

Ok so Ive been told that the best way to get things off your chest and feel better is to write a letter to the douchebag in question! Before today I felt as though I was  a prisoner to myself. I was caged in my own emotions and it was definately not a healthy way of living. Another thing you should never do is apologise for your feelings. Now Ive written all my thoughts down Im supposed to feel like a whole load of weight has been lifted off my shoulders right? Hmm. Maybe that part takes sometime. As long as you feel youve done your best and made the effort then I guess you cant say you never tried. Although right now I feel as though Im clutching on to a grain of rice. Someone once told me that if not  a day goes by without you thinking of that one person then its worth holding onto. Then some may say to forget it. Erase the person out of your memory. Theyre not worth holding on to. Thats the way to heal. Send them a huge letter and dont ever look back. There are arguments for both sides.What if holding on hurts you? But youre scared that by letting go it will hurt you more? Honestly it seems stupid to hold onto something keeps hurting you but it seems even more stupid to let go of everything youve ever wanted.
This is what sucks about life- there is never a clear answer.

Floral chic

So as I mentioned previously Im in school alot these days, just got back and thought Id show you my teacher like ensemble. I love how versatile these checked trousers are I can wear them with almost everything, they take my outfit to a whole nother chic level. The floral scarf draws the outfit together keeping me warm when im outside with the little ones. As always my outfit is completely high street, head to toe and affordable. It shows how one accessory can make any outfit. Anyway I hope you like it!

Blouse- new look 

Scarf- primark

trousers- river island